Worth the Trip Page 5

  When she gets to the bottom of the stairs, she walks across the room and right past me to Bob. He tells her how pretty she looks and slides the corsage he brought onto her wrist. I want to rip it off and throw it across the room, to tell him to keep his hands off of her because she’s MY Bevy, not his. I want to ask her why she got all gussied up for BOB MILLER and not me.

  My mom takes a few pictures of Bevy and Bob alone and then makes me get in one final picture as she gets her camera ready, telling us to smile. I can’t smile and I can’t stop staring at Bevy. I hear the flash of the camera and don’t even care that I wasn’t looking at my mom when she took it.

  My mom tells them to have a great time and stands in the open doorway, waving as they disappear from sight. I stomp upstairs to my room, slamming my door so hard I’m surprised it doesn’t break.

  A few hours later, lying on my back, staring up at my ceiling and trying not to think about what Bevy and Bob are doing, I hear something smack against my window. I quickly get up, throw my window open and see Bevy standing down in the grass with her shoes in her hand and a smile on her face as she looks up at me.

  “Get down here and walk me home like a gentleman!” she shouts.

  “I thought you already had a gentleman to do that for you?” I yell back, trying not to sound like a jealous jerk, wondering if Bob held her too close, if he tried to kiss her, and if she wants me to walk her home just so she can gush about all of those things.

  “You were right, he’s a jerk. He danced with another girl most of the night and then left early with her. So, are you going to walk me home or not?”

  I try not to smile, realizing Bevy didn’t have as great a time at the dance as I imagined. Racing down the stairs, I meet her outside and we walk side-by-side through town towards her house. We usually have lots of things to talk about, but tonight, it feels like the weight of the world is on my shoulders and I’m having a hard time telling her what I want to say.

  “What’s wrong, Trip?” Bevy asks me softly as we get to her driveway.

  I want to tell her that everything is wrong. Bevy should have been MY date tonight, not Bob’s. I would have held her close and danced with her all night, I would have made her happy and I never would have left her side. I’m afraid of what I feel for her. Everything is changing and it scares me. I don’t want to lose her as a friend, but I need more than just her friendship. I need her to tell me that she’d never really leave the island because she couldn’t stand the thought of being apart from me. I need her to love me as much as I love her, but what if she doesn’t? What will happen to us if I blurt out my feelings and she doesn’t share them? I can’t take that chance. Even if I have to love Bevy from afar for the rest of my life, at least she’ll still BE in my life. If I screw up our friendship, she may never speak to me again.

  “Nothing is wrong, Bevy. I’m just sorry you didn’t have a good time tonight,” I tell her instead, forcing a smile on my face.

  “So, why didn’t Kathy come tonight? I thought you were going to be chaperones?” she asks me with a smirk, knowing full well that I only threw that Kathy nonsense at her to tick her off.

  I shrug and slide my hands into my pockets as we walk up her front porch stairs. “You were right about her. She only cares about how much money I make.”

  We share a laugh as I open the screen door and she steps inside.

  “Thanks for walking me home, Trip,” Bevy says with a smile as she starts to back away from me into the house. I want to stay, I want to pull her into my arms and tell her I’m in love with her. I want to say so many things, but nothing comes out as I watch her move further away from me.

  I let go of the screen door and it starts to slam shut when Bevy quickly pushes it back open. She comes out on the porch and stands right in front of me.

  I hold my breath, wondering if maybe she really does feel something for me and she’s going to be the one to say it first. Bevy does like to win at everything.

  That thought puts a smile on my face until Bevy opens her mouth and speaks in a rush.

  “So, remember when I sang at the Uptown Lounge last year? Well, I guess there was record producer in the audience that night, and he started asking around about me. John Gates gave him my phone number. Anyway, this guy is a big time producer in California and he wants me to come out there and sing on a record. A real, live record! I leave the day before graduation.”

  My mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water.

  “You’re honestly going to leave before graduation?” I ask dumbly.

  She shrugs. “Who cares about graduation? I could be a huge star, Trip! All of my dreams are coming true. I don’t care about a stupid diploma. I already finished finals and I know I passed. It’s not like I’ll be missing much if I don’t go.”

  Me. You’ll be missing me. Please, tell me that you’ll miss me.

  Everything I know I should say to her is right there, on the tip of my tongue, but I don’t say anything at all as she disappears inside.

  I wish I had told her that she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. I wish I had told her that I love her and that I could make all of her dreams come true. I wish I hadn’t wasted so much time being an idiot.

  Chapter 10

  I run my fingers over the prom night photo and curse myself a hundred times. Closing my eyes for a few minutes, I try to will away all of the aches and pains in my tired, old body. I don’t have time to be sick or to worry about my health. I have to get these words on paper before it’s too late. Picking the notepad and pen back up, I continue writing my and Bevy’s story.

  If ever a boy needed a good, solid whack upside the head, it was me. I spent the next few weeks after prom being a complete dumbass where Bevy was concerned. Keenly aware of the clock ticking down on our time together, I spent every free moment at Bevy’s side, forgoing sleep altogether in exchange for throwing rocks at her bedroom window and sneaking down to the lighthouse. Sitting together under the stars, we talked about everything, including how much I hated working at the bank. She was going to make something of herself and I was going to be stuck working for Fisher’s Bank and Trust for the rest of my life.

  Being cooped up behind a desk was sucking out my very soul and I spent the days counting down the minutes until I could run out that stuffy building, tear off my suit and tie and get into the sunshine. I’d spent my off time the last few years helping people fix things around the island, a side job that had grown out of serving as Billy’s assistant on a few remodeling projects. A couple of local contractors had taken notice and taken me under their wings, showing me how to use a hammer and fix a leaky pipe. When I got off work at the bank, I yanked my suit off as fast as I could, threw on an old t-shirt and a pair of jeans and ran back into town to get another lesson on fix-it work. Regardless of how much money I stood to make at the bank, there was nothing I’d rather spend my days doing than working with my hands. In typical Bevy fashion, she told me to stop being a chicken and tell my father how I felt, that there was no point living your life doing something that made you unhappy.

  I laid my heart bare to Beverly O’Bryne over the course of those weeks, discussing everything except, of course, the only think that really mattered. I noticed things about Bevy I’d never taken the time to see and imagined how I would feel when she was gone, nearly making myself physically ill. I noticed how her laugh made my heart beat fast and how her smile, especially when it was aimed at me, made me feel like I hung the moon. All I could think about was Bevy leaving our island and how I might never see her again. So much wasted time. If only I’d have pulled my head out of my ass sooner.

  With the photo album resting next to me on the couch, I flip the page and stare down at a picture of Bevy in her cap and gown. Bevy had no plans of walking with her classmates at graduation, but I was the only one who knew that–or so I thought. When she brought home her packaged cap and gown from school that day, Bevy tried it on and asked my mom to take a picture. Right before my mom s
napped it, Bevy whispered in my ear, “This will be a nice photo to have, since I won’t actually be at graduation.”

  In the photo, Bevy has a huge smile on her face and I look like someone ran over my favorite dog. My arm is around her shoulder and she’s got hers wrapped around my waist. She’s smiling so bright at the camera because her whole life was just beginning. She had a plan that night and was so excited she could have burst. All I could think about in that moment was facing forever without her. I didn’t want her to go, but I had no idea how to make her stay. Flipping to the next page in the notepad, I shake out the tingling in my hand and continue writing.

  Chapter 11

  June 1952

  She’s leaving.

  The nightmare that’s plagued me from the moment she screamed how much she hated this island is coming true. Bevy is packing up and leaving me behind. When I stopped by her house earlier, she snuck me up to her bedroom (not that her father would have even noticed), showing me her packed suitcases as she explained her plan to leave on the last ferry off the island tonight. I told her she was crazy and asked if she really thought she was good enough to become a singing star and we got into a huge fight. I never should have said those things. I’d lashed out in desperation and anger, intentionally hurting her, something I hated myself for.

  She was supposed to come over for dinner tonight to celebrate her last day of school with us and my father has been asking where she is for the last hour. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that our Bevy is leaving us, that we might never see her again. I couldn’t bring myself to say the words out loud.

  I’m angry that she can just pack up and leave me without giving it a second thought and I’m jealous that she can so easily follow her dreams when I can’t even tell my own father that I want nothing to do with Fisher’s Bank and Trust. I’m miserable every day I spend inside that building. I like working with my hands, I like fixing things and getting dirty. I don’t want to wear a suit and be stuck inside for the rest of my life. I want to tell my father that I can’t follow in his footsteps, but I just don’t have the guts to do it. I’m not like Bevy. My father has groomed me to take over the bank since it opened. How can I just break his heart and tell him it’s not what I want? How can Bevy just break my heart and leave me? Why does all of this have to be so hard?

  As I pace back and forth in the hallway by the front door, my mother walks quietly up behind me and puts a hand on my shoulder. I stop pacing and turn to face her. She smiles softly and pulls me in for a hug.

  “I love you, son. I love the man that you’ve become and I’m so proud of you.”

  I swallow back tears and hug her back, not feeling much like a man in this moment. Tomorrow, Bevy will no longer be here to laugh at my jokes and challenge me to be a better person. For the first time in my life, I don’t want tomorrow to come.

  My mom pulls away and presses her hands to either side of my face. “No matter what choices you make in life, your father and I will still love you. But I’m telling you right now, if you don’t go after that girl, you’re going to regret it the rest of your life.”

  I look at her in confusion, wondering how she could possibly know what’s going on in my head. “I’m not a stupid woman, my boy. I know what Bevy is planning on doing tonight. We’ve talked about it a few times and she asked for my advice.”

  “Let me guess, you told her to go?” I ask angrily.

  “Why should she stay, Trip? Yes, I’m worried about her, but you and I both know her father is never going to love that girl like she deserves and give her the attention she needs. Now that her mother is gone, I told her to follow her dreams, something that girl should’ve done a long time ago. I’m telling you the exact same thing right now. I know you don’t want to work at the bank and your father knows it, as well. He’s just too stubborn to say anything. I also know you’ve been in love with Bevy longer than you care to admit. If you want something badly enough, you can’t be afraid to go after it. If you want to be a handyman on the island, do it. If you want to be with Bevy, do it. There’s nothing stopping you but your own fears.”

  I look away from my mother and take a deep breath. Bevy has been through a lot on this island. I know she wants to get away from the memories, but I need her here with me. I need to prove to her that I can erase all of the bad things and fill them with good.

  “What if she turns me down?”

  She pulls my face back towards her and stares deeply into my eyes. “You’ll never know unless you try.”

  Her hands drop from my cheeks and she leans up and kisses both of them before giving me a smile and heading back towards the kitchen to finish dinner.

  “The ferry leaves in twenty minutes,” she yells over her shoulder before disappearing around the corner.

  I don’t even hesitate before racing out the front door and down the steps of the porch to my car. I peel out of the driveway and make it to the ferry on the other end of the island just as the sun begins to set over the water. Jumping out of the car, I jog along the dock filled with people heading back to the mainland, my eyes peeled for brown curly hair and bright blue eyes in the sea of faces.

  I spot her standing by the roped off area next to the moveable walkway that will be hooked up to the ferry as soon as it docks. She’s got a suitcase clutched in both of her hands and one at her feet. I take a few moments to stare at her from a distance as she watches the boat slowly make its way towards the dock. She’s so beautiful it takes my breath away. She’s been my whole world for as long as I can remember and I can’t imagine spending even one day without her here to share my life. I shouldn’t have waited so long to tell her how I feel and I’m scared to death I might be too late.

  Pushing my way through the crowd of people, I stop right next to Bevy, lean down and pick up the suitcase from the ground. She turns and looks at me in surprise, gasping when I snatch the second suitcase out of her hands. Without saying a word, I turn and walk away from her, weaving in and out of the crowd of people waiting for the ferry as fast as I can.

  “TRIP! What are you doing? Will you get back here, the boat is almost here!” she shouts after me.

  I pick up my pace until I’m jogging down the dock and I hear her footsteps pounding behind me.

  “PUT DOWN MY SUITCASES RIGHT NOW, TRIP FISHER!” she yells as I jump off the dock and onto the sand.

  I move down the beach hurriedly until I feel her hand wrap around my arm and yank me to a stop. Tossing her suitcases to the sand, I turn around to face her. She’s got her hands on her hips and she’s really angry.

  “Trip! What has gotten into you? Give me my suitcases!” she demands.

  She leans down to pick them up and I block her way. When she stomps her foot, I can’t help but laugh.

  “Do you think this is funny? The ferry is going to leave without me, Trip. This is NOT funny!” she shouts.

  She moves towards her suitcases again and I put my hands on her upper arms, stopping her.

  “Don’t leave.”

  Bevy stares at me like I’ve lost my mind and I can’t blame her.

  “What are you talking about? I have to leave. I have a meeting with the record producer tomorrow,” she reminds me.

  “Don’t leave,” I beg again, moving closer to her.

  “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t leave?” she challenges, lifting her chin and glaring at me.

  “Because you just can’t leave. You need to stay here, with me.”

  She huffs and pulls out of my arms, shaking her head at me before turning and heading back towards the ferry.

  “Not good enough. Forget the suitcases, I don’t need them. I’ll just buy new clothes with all of the money I’m going to make when I sing on my first record!”

  She’s walking away from me and I start to panic. This is not how this was supposed to go. I’m messing everything up and she’s still going to leave me.

  “I LOVE YOU, BEVY! PLEASE, DON’T LEAVE!” I shout after her.

  She stops
in her tracks, but doesn’t turn to face me. I jog over to her and stand right behind her, wanting more than anything to put my arms around her, so I do. Wrapping my arms around her waist, I pull her body back against mine. I rest my chin on her shoulder and put my lips close to her ear, telling her everything I should have told her a long time ago.

  “You can’t leave because I’m in love with you, Bevy. I’ve probably been in love with you since the first time you threw sand at me, and I am a fool for not telling you before now. I love you. I love everything about you. I love that you challenge me and I love that you can run faster than me. I love that I can tell you anything and you won’t judge me. I love that you’re my best friend and I love that you make me laugh. I love you, Beverly O’Byrne, and I don’t want to spend even one day without you. I know this island is filled with sadness and bad memories for you, but if you give me a chance, just give me one chance, I will erase all of those bad memories and replace them with good ones.”

  She turns in my arms and I see tears falling down her face. I’m not sure whether they’re happy tears or sad tears, but I don’t allow myself time to second guess what I’ve done. Instead, I follow my dreams, exactly like my mother told me I should do. Grabbing both of her hands, I drop down on one knee on the sand at her feet and stare up at her beautiful, tear-stained face.

  “I’m sorry, I love you, please forgive me. I should’ve told you this sooner. I never should’ve wasted one minute of my time with you. Marry me, Bevy. Stay here and marry me. Please, don’t leave me,” I beg.

  The loud horn of the ferry echoes in the distance and Bevy closes her eyes. I’m scared to death she’s going to say no. My hands are sweating as I clutch tightly to hers and pray to God that I’m not too late.

  Bevy finally opens her eyes, smiles down at me and sniffles.

  “It’s about damn time, Trip Fisher. I love you, I won’t leave you, and of course I’ll marry you.”